My life, my face

Do you still do lashes? Can anyone do them or did you have to take a class to become certified? If you did have to become certified, how long did it take and how much did it cost?

Tue, 21 May 2013 19:03:01 -0700

Yes I still do lashes! Jackie O’Lashes is a full fledged business now. I’ve been doing lashes about a year now and business is great!

You can see some of my work and clients at facebook.com/jackieolashes

My instagram is @jackieolashes, I also post my work there

I got certified in Orange County. I did my research on where to go to school and chose mine based on the vibe I got from their site and work. I think it was 1000 dollars. It took two class days.

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Tue, 21 May 2013 16:32:59 -0700

molls: hellogiggles: HELLOGIGGLES EXCLUSIVE: ASSISTANT TO...

Tue, 21 May 2013 16:32:32 -0700

molls:

hellogiggles:

HELLOGIGGLES EXCLUSIVE: ASSISTANT TO HOLLYWOOD LEGEND TELLS ALL (CC @JARRADPAULASST)

by Molly McAleer

http://bit.ly/14tvqQT

THIS IS AN INTERVIEW I DID WITH THE ASSISTANT OF ONE OF THE BIGGEST NAMES IN HOLLYWOOD.

I’M GOING TO BE BEGGING THIS WOMAN FOR A JOB IN FIVE YEARS!!!!

two things: first, your bangs look aweome, and that short hair REALLY brings out your cheek bones. second, you still haven't told us that story. should I move on or should I keep hoping? actually, there is a third thing. you often talk about how you try to be positive and only surround yourself with good people, but does that mean that you don't dislike people anymore? or that you never get jeleaous? and how do you let annoying(but friendly) people know that they should stay away from you?

Tue, 21 May 2013 15:48:58 -0700

THANKS! I don’t ever want long hair again. I’m loving how much easier this is.

OMG, I am a dick. I forget that I have a very small yet very supportive and dedicated fan base that I left hanging! Here is the story:

So a couple months back now (sorry!) I had a very degrading commercial audition. As I’ve stated before, I’m very grateful for all my auditions, but this one was REALLY terrible. They had all of us waiting for over an hour. While all of our cars are getting parking tickets on them we sat there, apparently they knew who they wanted to cast and had the auditioning people wait while they locked that person down. But because we were all there they had us audition anyway, even though they booked the part. So it was a real waste of everyone’s time.

We would go in one by one, and it was this bit where we dropped a bunch of papers and had to pick them up meekly and defeated. So it was EXTRA sad. And the people watching the audition were very unamused to watch this, as we were also unamused to have to do it. So I left feeling kind of scummy. Just sometimes this town and business can really wear you down and make you feel worthless. This wasn’t the most uplifting experience.

So when I get sad I like to fill myself up with cheap, scummy food in an attempt to feel whole and warm again. AMERICA, WHO’S WITH ME!?

So on the way home I stopped at Taco Bell on Vine in Hollywood. I’m a vegetarian so I can’t go too cray there, but I knew a 7 layer burrito and some nachos supreme sub beans for beef would do the trick.

I pull up into the drive thru just as two other cars are pulling up at the exact same time from different directions. They both wanted to be first in line, so they were at a stand-still. One guy gestures to the other guy to let him in front. The other does the same. Then the windows roll down.

I’m sitting there in my car, already feeling down about human beings as a society, and now I’m witnessing perhaps the lowest form of humanity play out: two dudes fighting over how quickly their chalupas will hit their palms.

They start yelling at each other “I was here first! Get out of the way!” “No I was! Just let me pass!”

This went on for a minute or so, before one of the guys aggressively accelerated to force his way into the drive thru line in front of the other guy.

I watched, mouth agape. Have we no human decency? I just crawled on my hands and knees to pick up papers in front of a casting director and a commercial director that didn’t want to hire me but had to waste their day watching me embarrass myself, and now two guys are getting into a row over about a 2 minute delay in getting tacos?

I was about done with humanity. I was gonna order a bag of cinnamon twists to really stuff myself now. I needed EXTRA greasy consolation after witnessing this display.

So I’m now in the drive thru behind the two fighting guys. The one who went first is at the order box. All of a sudden he GETS OUT OF HIS CAR and starts WALKING OVER TO THE OTHER GUY’S CAR. I am freaking out. I am the most non confrontational, passive human being alive. This guy was so mad about their drive thru squabble that he’s gonna get physical with the other dude?!

And I’m trapped in my car like a sardine, I can’t go anywhere! I just have to sit and watch this trainwreck go down.

I watch in my read view mirror as the other guy rolls down his window. HE VOLUNTEERS THIS CONFRONTATION. I’m wincing, anticipating a bitch slap or a punch or an aggressive finger point…

…when the guy that got out of his car reaches his hand out to the other guy. He says “Sorry about the misunderstanding, man. I bought you a pina colada freeze.”

Then they shake hands and he goes back to his car.

So, instantly my faith in humanity was restored. Homeboy got his pina colada freeze, and dude that went first got his food 3 minutes sooner than homeboy. I feel that was a civil and fair deal.

After that silly audition that really helped me feel better. And my food was excellent.

So the moral of the story is, just when you think things are bad something will come along to remind you that it’ll all be alright.

I hope that was worth the wait!

Now about your other questions: I still get jealous and still encounter negative people/situations. Lately, I’ve been really day dreaming a lot what it would be like to have money and a career. I know a few very successful people and I think about what I would do if I had their success. I’m pretty sure that’s jealousy. But I always try to check myself by remembering that I have talent, appeal, and something specific to offer and it’s just a matter of time before the right person sees that and my success will come, too. I believe that. It does suck being broke, though, so I want it to come sooner than later!

And I have had to cut negative/annoying people out of my life. I think it is a part of growing up and becoming the best person you can be. I try to be positive and friendly to everyone but I’m still a human, I’m still a woman, and I’m still a comedian, aka insecure and hiding behind laughs! #TheTearsOfAClown So I have my bitchy moments, but they are way fewer and farther between now. And I always regret it after and check in with myself about it and figure out what was really wrong to make me go to a negative place. Most of the time it’s something internal I’m dealing with coming out as hate talk about someone or something innocent to the situation.

So I phase out people who are negative. That means I hang out with them less and less until we aren’t really in each other’s lives much. And if they ask me why we never hang out I’ll be honest and say that, however I hope they don’t confront me cause, again, I’m very non confrontational. “BAAAAHHHHH!” says the sheep.

I try to be nice to annoying people but I do snap and be rude to them sometimes. That’s more my issue than their’s I’m sure. But for real, I try to be nice to everyone. Cause I am nice, but also I’ve always enjoyed being friendly with all social circles, types, etc. and I like it that way. Nobody needs to try and act cooler than anyone else. That is InsecurityTown USA.

And I try really hard to not shit talk, judge, etc. I do still, but much less and more so to vent then I actually feel. I am happy for the good people around me and know if I put out the happy energy it will come back to me. It already has. I’ve been busier this year than any year before and I’m feeling good about things!

Being bitter will only bring you down. TRUTH. I know from experience and I live by that now.

I hope this long, rambling entry fulfilled all of your queries!

Thanks for sticking with me!!!

Guys. Please download YOUSINGIT, a game on the Iphone. I’m...

Tue, 21 May 2013 15:17:56 -0700

Guys. Please download YOUSINGIT, a game on the Iphone. I’m having way too much fun with it.

Please excuse that “poster” I made with an Iphone...

Mon, 20 May 2013 11:26:41 -0700

Please excuse that “poster” I made with an Iphone App, but I wanted to get the word out about a brand new Musical that I wrote and am a part of!

I am obsessed with Hoarders, as I’m sure a lot of you are, and I wrote a country musical about them. I’m SO proud of it and it stars a ton of very talented people- The official Musical Company of the Upright Citizens Brigade Theatre LA.

It’s premiering June 1st, Saturday at 10pm at the UCBTLA. Tickets are available here! They’re 10 dollars.

Come out if you wanna laugh and judge crazy people! My two favorite things.

-Jackie

I just bought this hat and we’re all gonna have to be okay...

Sun, 19 May 2013 20:37:47 -0700

I just bought this hat and we’re all gonna have to be okay with it. (at Melrose Trading Post)

molls: This is for us, Internet.

Sat, 18 May 2013 11:49:10 -0700

molls:

This is for us, Internet.

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Mon, 13 May 2013 18:53:09 -0700

ARE YA'ALL CAUGHT UP ON TANGENTS & THE TIMES???

Mon, 13 May 2013 18:51:14 -0700

ARE YA'ALL CAUGHT UP ON TANGENTS & THE TIMES???:

jennybradley:

marissaaross:

CAUSE THERE’S A NEW EPISODE TOMORROW SO SCOOT SCOOT BITCHES WATCH THIS SHIT

YES! Wondering when a new episode would be posted was the first thing I thought about when I woke up (at 1pm) today!

Can’t WAIT TO SEE THE REST!!!

thedailywhat: Justice Served of the Day: Instagrammed Meal...

Mon, 13 May 2013 18:50:39 -0700

thedailywhat:

Justice Served of the Day: Instagrammed Meal Results in Identity Theft Arrest

Oh noz, it looks like Florida Man did it again. Back in January, an undercover IRS informant met up with a South Florida couple for a fancy dinner at a steakhouse, during which they handed him a flash drive allegedly containing more than 50,000 stolen identities that could be used to file fraudulent tax returns. Upon examining the drive, the IRS was able to recover about 50 stolen identities and trace its footprint to a man named “Troy Maye.” Now, catching a thief red-handed is no cakewalk, but in this case, it literally turned out to be as easy as running a Google search. After finding Maye’s now-private Instagram account via Google search, the authorities were surprised to find a geotagged photo of his delicious steak dinner (shown above) from the same night he had met up with the informant. And the rest is history—the couple were promptly arrested by IRS agents and they are now facing up to 12 years in federal prison and serious fines.

Go Veg

synecdoche: gonna hand this out to everyone who has ever made...

Sun, 12 May 2013 22:56:52 -0700

synecdoche:

gonna hand this out to everyone who has ever made me cry by making fun of the way i pronounce certain things

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Sun, 12 May 2013 22:55:57 -0700

Brill

Sun, 12 May 2013 22:55:21 -0700

Brill

The bitchin brows I’ve always wanted courtesy of...

Sun, 12 May 2013 22:43:07 -0700

The bitchin brows I’ve always wanted courtesy of @katbardot

Guys, I just became a woman. #haircut #beforeandafter #yolo

Sat, 11 May 2013 15:06:13 -0700

Guys, I just became a woman. #haircut #beforeandafter #yolo

Great. My dog is Macklemore. #thriftshop #thechooch

Fri, 10 May 2013 22:43:40 -0700

Great. My dog is Macklemore. #thriftshop #thechooch

I was sick of spending 10 dollars on Coconut Kale smoothies so...

Wed, 08 May 2013 16:00:45 -0700

I was sick of spending 10 dollars on Coconut Kale smoothies so for about the same price I just made a whole pitcher’s worth! MOMMY ARE YOU PROUD OF ME?!

Happy Derby day from #SunsetRanch and #TheChooch!

Sat, 04 May 2013 19:03:36 -0700

Happy Derby day from #SunsetRanch and #TheChooch!

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Fri, 03 May 2013 17:28:13 -0700